


To Be Told

by onceandfuturedirection



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Claustrophobia, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-17
Updated: 2013-04-17
Packaged: 2017-12-08 19:16:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/765037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onceandfuturedirection/pseuds/onceandfuturedirection
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for this kinkmeme prompt-<br/>Niall is the last one in the dressing room after a concert gathering his things, and ends up accidentally getting locked in a closet, and starts panicking b/c there’s no lights and it feels like everything is closing in. Paul comes looking for him, and finds him pale/shaky, but Niall insists he’s fine and they get on the bus and head to the hotel.<br/>That night Niall can’t sleep b/c he feels closed in everytime he closes his eyes, and then Liam wakes up worried b/c Niall is slightly hyperventilating, and Niall tells him what happened</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Be Told

The residual adrenaline left over from the thrill of performing permeated the room, throbbing in the air as the boys gathered the last of their things, chatting and laughing loudly. They moved toward the door in a clump, clinging to each other subconsciously as they were wont to do after a show, bound together by the experience they had just shared. Niall gave one more cursory glance around the dressing room, before spotting his guitar in the far corner and shaking his head at his stupidity.

“Hang on lads” he called as he crossed the room to grab it.

He froze as a click plunged the room into blackness, and a resounding clunk signalled the closing of the door.  
Any buzz left from the show leaked out of him and was lost to the darkness.  
Panic washed over him

“Lads” a tremor cut into his voice.

“Liam?” 

Nothing.

Voices fading with distance told Niall his departure had gone unnoticed.  
He took a shuddering breath, tried to keep himself calm but the combination of black and silence and small wrapped around his chest and squeezed, forcing his breath out in harsh puffs and preventing him from taking in more than a shot’s worth of oxygen.  
Niall couldn’t tell if his eyes were open or closed, his fingers convulsed on the strings of his guitar and the darkness swam in front of him as his eyes filled with hot tears. 

The darkness lapped at him, it was oppressive. He was stuck. A code was required to get in and out of the room, as an extra precaution to guard against over enthusiastic fans and Niall couldn’t remember it, the dark and the space compressed his consciousness until there was room for nothing but panic. He wouldn’t have been able to move anyway, the door was so far away and everything else was so close, so so near and _close_ and around him. An aborted sob burst out of him.  
What if they left? What would he do? They hadn’t noticed when he’d gone back, Liam hadn’t noticed what if he was stuck here forever, he wouldn’t move, he couldn’t move-  
Suddenly, the door opened. 

Air rattled into Niall’s lungs as if the light that now flooded the room was filled with oxygen.

“Ahh there you are Nialler, come on we need to get back to the hotel”  
Paul paused as he looked at Niall  
“You alright?”  
“Y-yeah I’m fine” Niall gritted out, he wouldn’t show how scared he’d been over a shut door.

Niall hated how pathetic he was, he was an adult for gods sake but, somehow, tight spaces stripped all that away and left him a quivering mess. Paul didn’t need to know that though. Niall brushed past him on shaky legs, making his way to the bus.  
—-

When they got back, finally, the boys stayed down at the bar still riding on the high of the show. No one protested when Niall quietly excused himself. He cursed himself as walked past the open lift doors to the endless flights of stairs, not willing to risk it. Not that anyone would care anyway, Niall thought, swallowing the bitter lump that formed in his throat. He shook his head as he thought of Liam. He kind of expected it from the other boys but when Niall had got on the bus and Liam hadn’t even clocked the state he was in it felt like- almost like a betrayal. Liam knew, he always knew. 

Niall slid his keycard into the door, he’d made sure he had the sharing room that night. He made his way in, jumping at the click of the door and scrambling to turn on every light, including the bathroom, propping the door open.  
He shed his clothes and slid into bed, hating himself and his stupid fears. 

A beat of silence.

Niall closed his eyes, but tears leaked through anyway. A sob escaped, deafening in the silent room, followed by another, and another. Niall clutched the sheets up to his chin as he cried, feeling, above all else, desperately alone. 

—-

Liam sighed as he glanced at the clock, it was well into the early hours of the morning and while he had no clue what the plans were for the following day, he highly doubted a lie in would feature.

He was just so tired, Liam loved touring, he did, but there were only so many nights he could go without a proper sleep before he started to feel the effects, and he had passed that point long ago. He looked at the other boys. Having drunk more than their share, Louis and Harry were entertaining the rest of the crew with an elaborate tale involving a shared hotel room, an unlocked door and an unexpected return that had Zayn hiding his blushing face in his hands. Wearing a weary but genuine smile and under the cover of raucous laughter Liam slipped away and into the lift, hitting the button for their floor. He was rooming with Niall tonight, who had gone up ages ago so would probably be already asleep. Liam sighed with relief at the prospect of an undisturbed night, providing that Louis’ drunken brain remembered where his own room was. 

Liam pushed the door open, the room was lit up like a Christmas tree.

“Ni?” Liam called, peering round the corner to where the large white beds sat side by side dominated the room. 

“You still-?” he cut himself off, seeing Niall’s slack sleeping face peeking out of the top of the crisp white sheets. Liam tutted at the disregard for the environment as he flicked off all the lights, quickly brushing his teeth and relieving himself before shutting the bathroom door, stripping down to his boxers, and getting into bed in the cool darkness. He fell asleep almost immediately. 

—-

 

It took Liam a few seconds to realise what had bought him back to consciousness. He frowned into the darkness. Then, a noise. A whimper. And breathing, fast, loud breathing interspaced with hitched… Sobs?

“Niall?” Liam whispered

The noises continued.  
Liam sat up, rubbing his eyes. He wavered for a moment before climbing out of his bed and into Niall’s. Liam moulded himself to his back, ignoring the flutter of feeling the touch of Niall’s sleep warm skin evoked. He was getting good at that, ignoring. 

 

“Ni, wake up c’mon, it’s just a dream”

Liam shook him gently.

“No m’awake” a small stuttering voice replied. Liam frowned, then pulled Niall closer, turning him round so he was cradled in his arms, legs tangled together, head on Liam’s chest.

 

“What’s wrong Nialler?” 

Glassy eyes stared up at him from a blotchy face. 

“I just- I” Niall began before his face scrunched up like paper and he began to cry in earnest.  
Liam started, alarmed before his protective instincts kicked in and he began to rock the shivering boy in his arms hushing him and whispering nonsense into his hair until the tears subsided. 

“Babe, what’s the matter, are you ill?”

“No, I’m fine it’s stupid” Niall shook his head.

“No, no that is not good enough, don’t forget I know you Niall Horan” Liam replied, not mollified by Niall’s protests.  
Niall gave him a watery smile then began, haltingly

 

“You guys le- I got left in the dressing room- shut in the dressing room earlier, the lights were off and it felt really small, that’s all, then it was dark when I woke up and I- I was remembering”, but his tone belied his blasé words and more tears spilled down his cheeks.

Liam gasped “Ni no that’s scary! Why didn’t you tell us?”

Niall gritted through his tears “I didn’t want you to think I was stupid! I’m 19 and I get scared like a- like a fucking baby” Liam pulled him impossibly closer and shook his head 

“And-” Niall continued “And I thought you’d notice something was wrong, especially you, Li”  
A wave of guilt crashed over Liam, he’d been so concerned with himself and his tiredness he hadn’t even considered that Niall’s silence on the way to the hotel was anything but the same.

“Ni, I’m really sorry”  
Niall shook his head and buried his face deeper into the gap between Liam’s neck and his shoulder. 

“It’s fine, I’m stupid, I’m a baby I told you”  
Liam took Niall’s face between both hands and forced him to look him in the eyes.

“Niall, you are not a baby, I don’t want you to ever think that because you’re older, or because people expect things from you, that your fears aren’t real or are somehow invalid, alright? And above all” his voice dropped from a growl to a whisper, intimate, just for the two of them

“above all I don’t ever want you to be afraid to tell me, because I can tell you now, that is the one time, the only time where your fears are completely unjustified, ok?”  
They looked at each other.

“Ok” Niall whispered.

For that moment, they were connected. Liam became acutely aware of Niall’s limbs tangled with his own, the soft brush of every exhale on the skin of his face.  
It seemed like the most natural thing in the world for Liam to dip his head and lay a kiss on Niall’s lips.

They both froze.

An “Oh” broke the silence. Whether it came from Liam or Niall the sentiment was shared by both. A moment of suspended surprise hung as they looked at one another.

“Sorry” Liam breathed, his heart in his throat  
“Are you?” Niall’s voice was steady, his eyes serious as they bored into Liam’s  
“I- I don’t know, am I?  
“You tell me.”  
“Are _you_ ?”  
“What?”  
“Are you so- oh fuck it”

And Liam leant in, and finally, finally allowed the constant hum of maybe, of what if fill his mind and take over. He stopped ignoring and his lips touched Niall’s, tentatively still laced with a careful uncertainty despite his words.

Until Niall let out a shuddering breath against his lips, deepening the kiss.

Until all doubt was gone, there was no room for interpretation, they both wanted this. The soft fragile sounds of touching lips, and rasping stubble interspersed with panting breaths filled the room.

It wasn’t ground breaking. It wasn’t earth shattering, but what it represented was and as Liam rearranged them carefully until he was on top of Niall, thigh between his own he paused for a moment, the sheer meaning of what they were doing filling him with warmth and fear in equal measure.

“Please Li” 

Liam’s hips jerked as Niall’s shuddering voice broke into his reverie, slotting them together like two pieces of a puzzle. The feeling of warmth sparked, and ignited, and began to burn with a slow intensity as Liam ducked his head and connected their lips once more, moving against Niall as his hands roamed up and down his sides. He slid his hands between them, feeling warm, soft skin under his trembling hands.

They broke apart

Liam could feel Niall’s breath against his parted lips.  
He ground his hips down, hard, and smiled as the rhythm stuttered.  
Liam looked at him. Reached out a hand and brushed a damp lock of hair back from his forehead. Un-styled, un-coiffed Niall had always been his favourite. But looking down at him now, face flushed, eyes still damp from now forgotten, overridden tears, and pure naked trust radiating from every pore Liam thought he’d have to reconsider.

A restrained whimper broke the silence between them and Liam snapped out of his reverie. Niall’s eyes widened and his cheeks grew even pinker.  
Liam’s mouth slid into what can only be described as a- a predatory smile and he dove back down, slipping his hand into the gap between the crumpled sheets and Niall’s arched back. 

Now, Niall was writhing beneath him, he needed him and Liam was more than willing to give him everything.

They weren’t naked, not quite, but it didn’t matter. Liam pushed at clothes until they allowed skin to touch. The only physical remnants of a barrier which in reality had broken down long ago. Thin boxers rucked around bent knees like a concertina. 

Liam grasped the both of them in hand, already slick and pulsing with the knowledge of what they were doing and who they were doing it with.  
They wouldn’t last, they couldn’t not with the sheer weight and gravitas of the situation adding to the overwhelming pressure building in their groins.

Liam tightened his hand, jerking them roughly as the feeling inside him built and rose and caught fire and everything narrowed to silky skin and hot and hard and drawing up tight tight tight.

A desperate gasp.

Come splashed his stomach.  
If he hadn’t been moments away himself he would have stopped to appreciate the shocked look on Niall’s face, to admire the awe and wonder and bliss oozing out of him.

But nothing had stopped for him. His hand cramped and his wrist ached as he chased, reached for that crescendo, little “ah ah ah” sounds forced their way out of his gritted teeth, all of his muscles locked down in preparation. 

A tentatively confident hand slid below his own to cup his balls, to draw one gentle finger over his perineum and he was there, he was right there and it was too much, too good and his hand dropped and he clutched at the top of Niall’s thigh, where his leg met his groin, and a had joined his own and they were together in this, in everything as Liam came harder than he’d thought possible.

And, as they came down together, a sense of absolute calm enveloped the room. Lips curved into smiles, a nose bumped into another, a finger touched a palm. It didn’t matter whose, didn’t matter which of the two initiated, which responded. They lay, together, cocooned in the knowledge that they were mutual, an entity. And both knew with a solid, concrete kind of certainty that they would tell, and they would be told.

**Author's Note:**

> as per feedback is like oxygen to a writer!  
> Also on tumblr- URL deadstagram  
> (come talk to me)  
> hope you enjoyed


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